Warriors' Friday the Thirteenth
by Shado Room of Souls
Summary: This has no relation to Jason and his Friday the Thirteenth. Chapters will be random. Chapters will be short-ish. Chapters will probably involve a lot of screaming. Note: Only updated on Friday the 13ths.


**A/N: It's Friday the Thirteenth! So, in celebration of this epic day, I shall write a one-shot for you guys. Here it is. Also, I don't own Warriors. If I did, I would remember whether Ashfur was a Warrior when Fireheart and Graystripe were. :P WARNING. This story contains emoticons and GayGraystripe.**

Fireheart looked at Graystripe, then again at Ashfur.

"What the hell is he doing?" Graystripe asked his ginger friend. They exchanged a glance, then turned their attention back to Ashfur, who was high up in a tree.

"I saw a squirrel!" the gray tom's mew reached down faintly. All of a sudden, a squirrel ran out in front of him on the branch. "SQUIRREL!" Ashfur snagged it with his claw easily. When he was on the ground again, Fireheart sprang, paws on the tom's neck, prey forgotten.

"ARE YOU INSANE?" Fireheart screamed at Ashfur, shaking him violently as he did so. "TODAY IS FRIDAY!"

"What's a Friday?" Ashfur asked, frightened but curious.

"It's a special day that only kittypets know about. Anyway, IT'S THE THIRTEENTH!"

"Uhhh….." Ashfur looked at Graystripe, who shrugged.

"Maybe he got into the catnip." The gray furred tom whispered to Ashfur.

"I did NOT get into the catnip again!" Fireheart shook Ashfur harder unknowingly as he denied all charges against him. Graystripe started to slowly back away, from the crabby tabby.

"I did not say you could leave the room, young man! You come back here right now!" Fireheart glared at his friend, who quickly came back, not wanting to suffer any wrath of a ginger in anger. _Wait, 'I did not get into the catnip __again__'? _Graystripe thought warily.

"B-but but but-" he protested, glancing at Ashfur.

"No buts! Shut up and eat your supper!"

". . ."

"Now go to your room!"

Graystripe slowly turned around, and then ran back to camp, leaving Ashfur to suffer the fury of his demented friend.

**- (el page break)-**

**(Back at camp)**

"Bluestar, Bluestar!" Graystripe screeched as he raced into camp.

"Yes, Graystripe?" the blue-gray she- cat replied boredly, licking a paw.

"I'm fine, thanks." the gray tom remarked. "Anyhoo, Fireheart's gone crazy!"

Still licking the same paw, Bluestar looked at him. "What else is new?"

"No, you don't understand! Nobody does!" the tom wailed, then continued on like nothing happened. "He's gone completely, utterly, unspeakably-"

"Graystripe!"

"Wacko." the Warrior finished. Bluestar's eyes went wide. She sprang to her paws.

"Quickly, we need-" she paused to lick her paw one more time. "To get him away from-" She glanced at Graystripe for whatever cat's name Fireheart was terrorizing this time. Last time it had been Brindleface.

"Ashfur." At the name Bluestar stopped.

"Him? Oh, leave him." ["WHAT?" Graystripe interjected, but his leader continued without noting his interruption.] He dies by the claws of Hollyleaf in The Power of Three anyway." Bluestar resumed licking the exact paw she had been grooming for ten minutes.

"Wha-Oh never mind." Graystripe dashed out of camp.

After he was out of earshot, Sandstorm snickered. "You think he's gay for Ashfur?" Bluestar grinned.

"Totally."

When Graystripe returned, Ashfur was dead, and Fireheart was nowhere to be found. As the gray striped tabby examined Ashfur, he noticed Ashfur's ears. And made this face: OwO (with sparkly eyes) "They're…PERFECT!" so he cut them off and sacrificed them to Starclan. Afterwards, he turned back the earless corpse and did what he had planned to all along.

"WHYYYYYYY?" he yowled to Starclan. "Well, now that that's over, time to find my new soulmate."And with that, he padded away.

**After many hours of walking into the forest and coming to Barley's barn….**

Barley looked up in surprise at Graystripe, who was walked towards the barn and calling, "Here kittykittyFireheartkittyyyy…." And made this face: -_- as Graystripe proceeded to run right into the barn wall.

"Graystripe, why are you here?" Barley said, irritated.

"Haz you seen Fireheart?" the Warrior asked. Barley exchanged glances with Ravenpaw, who had recently come out of the barn to see what was going on.

"We need to take him to Leafpool."

**EDIT: I had to take the A/N out of the middle of the story (sorry FF!), so I'm putting them here.**

**No, I do not agree with Ash/Gray, the Sandstorm remark popped into my head and I had to put it in here. **

**I kind of agree with Fire/Gray, but Silver/Gray is the best (by my standards, anyway).**

**Sorry it was so short, have to post before timelock! I will only update on Friday the 13ths, so, yeah. Hope you had fun! Click review and put this on Alerts! Shado, out *salute*. ^w^**


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